6 Ways to Ask for What You Want

It’s difficult for most of us to ask for help. We often fear that our request for help will be denied and we sometimes even expect that we will be rejected. To avoid the pain of this rejection we choose not to ask.

Here are five ways to make asking for help much easier. It will be worth your while to make a note of these tips when needing to ask for help. Being able to ask for help will make your life so much easier to navigate.

Tip 1. Ask as if you expect to receive help. A positive mindset will help you ask with greater confidence. You expect this help, you deserve to receive help and the person you are asking is happy to help. In fact they truly want to help you.

The difference between the two ways of asking is all in your expectation. Either you don’t expect to be helped or you do. The positive expectation will make your approach much friendlier; your mood will be lighter and you will cope with the whole process a lot better. Even if you get a no, you won’t take the rejection personally.

Tip 2. Assume you can. Don’t allow negativity into your mind. You will have a greater chance of finding a parking spot if you assume you will get one, than if you assume you won’t. Assume you will get a ticket to a show, a scholarship, a raise or the job. Assume the best for yourself and more often than not you will receive it.

Tip 3. Ask someone who can provide the help you need. Find out who is the right person by asking who can provide me with the answer, who is the person in charge, or who would you need to speak to in order to...? Researching who the right person or organization is will go a long way towards achieving success. Asking the right person will contribute hugely to your success.

Tip 4. Be clear and specific. When asking for help identify what you need help with. Be specific and be prepared to explain how the assistance will impact you

We tend to find it easy to ask for smaller things. If we need a baby sitter we know exactly what date and time you need a sitter for your children. It’s the bigger problems that we want find difficult to identify specifics. It is likely because we don’t feel comfortable admitting we need help.

Tip 5. Ask repeatedly. One of the most important principles of success is persistence. Don’t give up. Whenever you ask people to help you achieve our goal or solve your problem there will be some who say no. They might have other priorities, commitments and other reasons why they cannot help you. It’s not a reflection on you.

Get used to the idea that you will have some rejections along the way. Not everybody will be the right person to ask or will have the time to spend with you. If/when you are told no, follow up by asking for a referral to someone who can help.

Tip 6. Be sure to thank those you ask whether they agree to assist you or not. An attitude of gratitude will keep that door open for future requests.