Take Control, Part Four

Take Control, Part Four

If You Try to Control People or Things Outside Your Sphere of Operation, You Get Problems

However, control in itself is not an entire answer to everything, for if it were one would have to be able to control everything, not only in his own job, but in an office or on earth, before he could be happy.

When an individual attempts to extend control far beyond his active interest in a job or in life he encounters difficulty.

Thus there is obviously another factor involved than control. This factor is willingness not to control and is fully as important as control itself.

For example, when the manager of Department A tries to control employees in Department B, problems come up. As long as he sticks to controlling his sphere of operation, which is Department A, all is well.

You may have felt overwhelmed in the past when you tried to control something that was not part of your sphere of operation. If it is not your responsibility, why bother?

For example, list all the things he you are concerned about.

● Business income is down
● The roof is leaking in the office building
● Your son or daughter is having problems at college in another state
● Your community club meetings are irregular
● Your quarterly tax payments are late

Are you trying to fix all of these problems without success?

Only the first problem is in your sphere of operation. All the other problems were outside your zone.

The landlord was in charge of the roof.

The son/daughter is on their own.

You are not in charge of the community club meetings.

Your accountant will negotiate a deal with the Internal Revenue Service.

While it would be wonderful if you could control all of these problems, you need to change your mind and let others control them.

As soon as you realize this, you will relax. You’ll be able to focused the income and soon solve the first problem.

Meanwhile, the landlord will install the new roof. Your child will realize he/she is responsible for their own success, good or bad, and start doing better. You can stop attending the community club meetings and your accountant will solve the IRS problem.

People may try to make you control things outside your zone of operation. You must refuse. Three examples:

Someone asks you for a loan to pay his bills. You say, “While I'm sorry you can't pay your bills, I'm not going to pay them for you. You need to solve this yourself.”

Your sister sees your grandson watching television and tells you, “Don't let him watch TV.” You say, “I agree he shouldn't watch TV, but he's my daughter's son, not mine.”

Your boss asks you to go fix the sales problem with another department. You say, “Even though I'm the domestic sales manager, I'll be happy to fix the international sales department . . . if you promote me to Vice President of Worldwide Sales.”

Recommendations

1. Make a list of areas in your life that are difficult for you to control.

2. Add a list of things that bother you to the first list.

3. Circle all the items that are outside your sphere of operation.

4. Decide to stop trying to control these circled items. Let them go.

5. Work on the remaining items on your list as you can control them.

For example, a coworker slurps his coffee each morning. It drives you crazy! You drop hints and make jokes, but he still slurps away.

You realize the coworker's noise is outside your sphere of operation and so you stop all efforts to make him stop slurping. You focus on your job instead. You soon realize you don't care about the slurping noise any longer. No more stress!

Take Control, Part Three

Your Control Problems Are Caused by Your Weaknesses with Starting, Changing or Stopping

“Franticness, helplessness, incompetence, inefficiency and other undesirable factors in a job are all traceable to inabilities to start, change and stop things.”

“No business can succeed unless it has been properly started, unless it is progressing through time or changing position in space and unless it is capable of stopping harmful practices and even competitors.”

“Thus the secret of doing a good job is the secret of control itself. One not only continues to create a job, day by day, week by week, month by month, he also continues the job by permitting it to progress, and he is also capable of stopping or ending any cycle of work and letting it remain finished.” from The Problems of Work

To improve your control, you strengthen the part of control that is most difficult for you. To do this, start by identifying your weakest part. Which is most difficult for you: starting, changing or stopping?

Signs You Have Difficulties Starting Things

You have many ideas that you never implement. You make notes and even write down plans, but you never start them.

You may even obtain the material you need to do a job, but do not start it. For example, you buy the tools and materials to build a dog house, but never actually start to build the dog house.

You might have big goals, great plans or incredible dreams, but you never take that first step.

Signs You Have Difficulties Changing Things

You may take the first step on a work project, but you never get much done.

You might leave things incomplete. For example, you paint a wall with the first coat, but never get around to putting on the second coat.

You might follow the same routine you learned in school or have had for years, even though you know a better way exists.

You possibly make big resolutions every New Year and do well for a day or two. Yet you never really make the change.

Signs You Have Difficulties Stopping Things

You probably have bad habits that you cannot break. You might say, “I just can't stop myself.”

You may hate to throw things away, even if they are useless. Your closets are stuffed with worthless junk.

If you force yourself to finish a project, you are likely to leave your tools lying around as you hate to clean up after yourself.

If you are a boss, you take too long to fire employees, even though they deserve it. Stopping people, who are damaging your operation, may be difficult for you. You may also have a hard time ending bad relationships or forgiving people.

When you give a job or object to someone, you have a hard time leaving him or her alone. You can't stop possessing the responsibility or the object.

Signs You Are Fixated on Start, Change or Stop

Control is also difficult if you are fixated or obsessed with starting, changing or stopping things.

For example, you are constantly starting new programs or projects. Every week or so you start a new project or two. Unfortunately, they do you no good as you or your group cannot complete all the things you start.

Or you are constantly changing things. You do not like the way things are. You are never satisfied. Unfortunately, you end up changing things that should be left alone.

Or maybe you like to stop things a little too much. Your first reaction to any change is to stop it or end it. If you are a boss, you fire people too quickly. You throw things away you later need. Or maybe you feel like a police officer and constantly try to stop bad things from happening. Unfortunately, you end up stopping good things, as well.

Recommendations

1. Determine your biggest problem: starting things, changing things or stopping things.

2. Write down how you can improve this weakness this week.

3. As you make these improvements, notice how your control improves.

4. Keep working on your weakest areas until you enjoy more success. When you can easily and effectively start, change and stop things when they need to be started, changed or stopped, you are in control.

Remember the most important aspect of your life that you can control is your thoughts. 

Take Control, Part Two

“Control consists entirely of starting, changing and stopping. There are no other factors in positive control. If one can start something, change its position in space or existence in time and stop it, all at will, he can be said to control it, whatever it may be. If one can barely manage to start something, can only with difficulty continue its change of position or existence in time and if one can only doubtfully stop something, he cannot be said to control it well, and for our purposes he would be said to be able to control it poorly or dangerously. If he cannot start something, if he cannot change its position in space, if he cannot stop something, then he is definitely not in control of it.”

Start

If you are a boss, a parent or a leader, you know how difficult it can be to control others. Yet when you control people properly, they like it!

People feel satisfied when you control them properly. You start them, allow them to make changes and then stop them when they are finished.

“Jill, please bring me the red pen . . .” (Start) “. . . and put it right there.” (Change) “Thank you very much.” (Stop)

People do not like you to control them when you mess up any of the three points.

For example, if a business does not start its employees by telling them when they should arrive for work, people just start work when they get around to it. The late starters irritate the prompt starters. Some might not start at all. The business is a messy confusion.

So if you want to control a group or an individual, you need to give a clean “START” and then let them get on with it. “Everyone must be here at 8:00 AM for staff meeting. Not 8:01! We will start the meeting at 8:00.” Of course, you then make sure the meeting starts exactly at 8:00.

Change

Once you start someone, you create problems if you prevent the change portion of the cycle. For example, you tell one of your staff members, “Dave, please sweep up this room.”

Just as he gets out the broom, you say, “Dave, you need to file these papers right now.”

After he files a few papers, you say, “Hurry Dave, go get me a box!”

You earn better cooperation if you let people complete the change without interruption.

“Dave, please sweep up this room.”

Stop

The final mistake you can make when controlling people is not stopping them. For example, you fail to notice they are done and do not acknowledge them for finishing. If you do not stop people, they may tend to keep working on the project indefinitely.

For example, you say, “You swept up the room very well.”

If you don't stop the cycle, you lose control. By cleanly stopping the cycle, you complete your control on that matter. People are now open to your next cycle of control. You are in charge.

When people discover that you cleanly start, change and stop them, you can ask and obtain more and more from them. You can give complicated instructions, long lists of tasks and major projects. They feel comfortable with your control as they know you will let them complete the work and acknowledge them when they are done.

Some people believe you need to use fear, force or threats to control people. The government and certain institutions get a bad reputation for using fear and threat. This type of control makes you feel like you are a slave.

A business manager runs into trouble when he tries the same type of control. His or her employees revolt!

Fortunately, you will find that using the information in this article will put you in much better control than fear, force or threats. Simply start, change and stop people, cheerfully, cleanly and consistently.

Exercise

1. Write down the name of someone you want to control.

2. Write what end result you want the person to accomplish.

3. Plan how you will:
   A. Start him or her
   B. Allow or direct the needed changes or activities
   C. Bring him or her to a stop

4. Finally, follow the steps of your plan.

Example:

1. You want to control your 10-year-old son, Joey. He gets upset when you tell him to clean his room.

2. You want Joey to clean up his room when you ask and without any drama.

3. You work out your plan.
   A. You get him to agree on a time to start. “Joey, in 10 minutes, I'd like you to start cleaning up your room.”
   B. You will direct the change part of the cycle by watching and helping, as needed. “You're doing a good job Joey. Let's look under the bed now . . . “
   C. You acknowledge his good work. “Joey, that is a really clean room! Good job!”

4. You then follow your plan. Joey calms down, cleans his room and feels proud of himself.

Example:

1. The only person who understands your computer is also a jerk. Russ is constantly complaining about your old equipment.

2. The end result that you want is that Russ does his job without complaining.

3. You work out your plan.
   A. You decide on how to get Russ to start. “Russ, instead of just showing up this week, can you start at 10:30 on Wednesday? Great.”
   B. You plan on how to change Russ. “Russ, I know our equipment is old which is why we need your help. Instead of complaining, it would be great if we could just make it work, okay?”
   C. You plan on how to stop Russ. “Russ, you did a great job. I'll take it from here. Thanks.”

4. You implement your plan with Russ. At first, he is resistive to your control. But you persist and gain small pieces of control until you are successfully starting, changing and stopping Russ. You are soon in control of the relationship.

So starting with step 1, who would you like to control?

Take Control, Part One

Like money or nuclear power, control can be used for good or evil. You can use it to harm, suppress or destroy lives. Or you can use it to help people, increase your income and improve the world around you.

Negative, destructive control gives control a bad name. Yet positive, constructive control is essential to successful living. No control over your job, family or life leads to failure.

When you are not in control of your sphere of operation, you feel stress, fear and frustration.

When you are in control, you make progress, enjoy your work and achieve success.

Taking better control of yourself, your time, career, business, equipment, computers, marriage, family, personal property, bad habits and so on, is much easier when you understand and apply these five facts about control.

1. Control is the biggest difference between success and failure.

2. Control consists of three parts: Start, Change and Stop.

3. Your control problems are based on your weaknesses with starting or changing or stopping.

4. If you try to control people or things outside your sphere of operation, you fail.

5. To succeed, you must let others control you.

Control Is the Difference Between Success and Failure

Certain symptoms show how well you control your job.

10 Signs You Are Not in Control of Your Work

*Easily fatigued or exhausted

*Work area is messy and disorganized

*Job is not interesting

*Easily stressed

*Need constant help

*See no way to improve performance

*Easily confused by others while on the job

*Frequently think of quitting

*Frantically react to emergencies

*You cannot conceive of greater productivity

10 Signs You Are in Control of Your Work

*Energized, motivated

*Work area is neat and organized

*Work is interesting and enjoyable

*Feel challenged, not stressed

*Effectively supervise self

*Constantly looking for ways to improve

*Rarely confused while on the job

*Frequently thinking of more responsibility

*Rationally respond to emergencies

*You have good ideas for increasing productivity

On a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being in full control, how well do you control of your job? Your home life? Your possessions? Your personal habits? Your success?

Recommendations

1. Make a list of all your duties, responsibilities and areas of your life.

2. Rate your control of each on a scale of 1 to 10.

3. Work out a plan to take a little more control of each.

Use Feedback to Help You on Your Way

In the business environment market research is used to
determine what products might be useful for the target market
and which ones could be profitable and popular. In our lives we
seldom do any market research. We decide on a goal and just go
for it.

Use feedback like market research. There are several ways of
going about it. You can ask around for feedback on an idea you
have and build your goal around the answers you receive. For
instance you might want to start a new hobby and think that
playing a musical instrument could be fun.

However, you have no idea what kind of instrument would appeal
to you. So you ask around a bit. You talk to music teachers
and find out what kind of lessons are available in your town.
You don’t want to go to the expense of buying a tuba if there
is nobody far and wide who can teach you.

Then you have a look and see whether the instrument you have
chosen is easily available. Or if you want to learn to play a
piano, will the instrument fit into your home? Have you got
space for it and can it fit through the front door? Then you
might need to see how noisy the instrument is. If it’s too
loud your neighbors might not approve.

Many questions later you might find that you can’t actually
learn an instrument because you live in the wrong area and
have no teachers near you never mind that you can’t afford
the instrument or the lessons if you could get to those.
You might want to reconsider your hobby and take up painting
instead.

Conduct your market research, ask your questions, and get
feedback. This doesn’t only apply for when you start on a
new goal. This could be all along the route you are taking.
Get feedback to help you along your journey.

If you are entering a new degree program you might want to
ask your professor whether your project work and assignments
are good enough. If not what else could you do to improve on
them? Maybe you even need to change subjects.

Use the feedback you ask for to help plan your route and get
your directions. You will want to ensure that you are on the
right path. One of the easiest ways of doing this is to ask
for directions.

Amongst the people you might want to ask could be fellow
travelers. These could be co-students for your degree
program or team members in a sport club or fellow runners
if you are attempting your first marathon.

It might be people at work when you start a new job or are
promoted to a management position. Asking your co-workers
as to how you are managing the transition could give you
invaluable feedback and excellent directions on how to
approach your job.

As long as you view the feedback as positive guides and
see them as offers of help you will be able to make use
of this to help smooth your path and find your goals with
less effort and possibly even with greater happiness.

Ask for Feedback (Part 2)

Many of us are very unwilling to ask for
feedback. This is because we are anxious
about what we will hear. We would rather
keep our head buried in the sand and not
hear any bad news or negative feedback.

As much as this is understandable it does
us no good if we do not know the truth.
If you are not providing the level of
service or quality of product your
customers and clients expect wouldn’t it
be better to know so you can make
adjustments before they leave you for
another provider?

Asking for feedback about your
performance, level of service, or quality
of product will give you an invaluable
advantage over those who fail to ask. And
if your clients/customers tell you that
you are coming up short you will be able
to repair the damage rather than find
your customers/clients have moved on.

Asking for, and acting on, feedback can
be a lot less damaging than waiting for
the end result. This is true in all
areas of life; including your health,
and personal relationships. Got a lump;
better get feedback from the doctor. It
will be easier to fix if you act quickly
rather than wait.

In many cases when you ask for feedback
you will find that you are the last
person to know. Your partner has already
complained about your behavior to her
friends and family. Your lecturer has
already discussed you progress with the
head of the department. Your boss has
already discussed his or her options with
the human resources department.

If you are a bad manager the whole office
knows already. If you are slipping up as
a sales person not only does your sales
director know this already but your
clients as well. People are too worried
about offending you to tell you what is
wrong. They would rather go to somebody
else. Now you are suddenly losing your
spouse, clients, and your job.

Find out what’s going on and take action
to fix what is broken. You cannot improve
your management skills, your relationships,
and your sales performance if you don’t
get feedback.

Wouldn’t it be easier to walk into the office
in the morning with smiling faces welcoming
you rather than everybody scurrying away and
avoiding you? How would you know what is
happening if you don’t ask for feedback?
And how often do we pretend everything is ok?

Get rid of those blinders and ask for
feedback. Ask your partner, your friends,
your colleagues, your sales director, your
clients or your coach. Make it a habit to
ask for feedback. Ask how you can improve
and what would make the situation better for
everybody.

Once you have your feedback, be grateful you
got it. Remember the person giving you feedback
is risking your rejection by offering you
feedback. Accept feedback with gratitude and
understand how lucky you are that you can fix
things before they get too serious.

Ask For Feedback

There are times in our lives we stand at a cross
roads and we don’t know what to do. What would
help us at a time like this is to find a person
or coach and get some feedback that will allow
us to maximize our life experiences. The problem
is that most of us don’t ask or employ a coach;
we think we can do this ourselves.

There are many times when we are faced with
difficult decisions and are not sure what to do
next. Often we ask the wrong person, like our
best friend. What does she or he know about the
situation you are facing? Is he or she a subject
matter expert in this area? Asking the wrong
people often gets us the wrong answer. This makes
us hesitant to ask in the future because we have
had a bad experience.

Yet we ask our friends more readily than going to
get feedback from an expert. Is this because we
feel vulnerable when we ask? Is it because an
expert will make us pay for information? Or is
because we just don’t know who to ask?

Everybody needs help. There are areas of our life
where we are obviously slipping up, not achieving
our potential, maybe even being a failure. Yet
often we would rather not ask for feedback than
be at risk to be told that we are not good enough.

This means that in some areas of your life we are
struggling unnecessarily. We grapple with
questions and problems without asking for feedback.
Missing out on advice and guidance will stop us
from developing ourself to the better person that
we can be.

How do you know if you are a good manager? How do
you know whether you are a good partner? How do
you know whether you are doing your job well? You
don’t unless you get feedback from the people
involved.

Ask your staff for feedback to see how you rate as
a manager. Discuss your relationship by being open
to getting feedback. Participate in job assessments
so that you can learn what needs to be improved
upon.

Finding the courage to ask for feedback will provide
you with invaluable information to enable you to
improve on your relationships with the people you
come into contact with. This can be people you live
with or people you work with.

In all instances asking for feedback as to how you
are delivering as a manager, partner, team or staff
member will allow you to grow and develop better
people skills and contribute to happier relationships
in areas of your life.

Being afraid to ask will not help you in your quest
towards developing more meaningful and happy
relationships. Asking for feedback will not only
help you to grow but will also help the person you
have asked to provide you with information that will
be of assistance to you.

How Do You Respond To Feedback?

Have you ever played a game as a child where you
had to find something and all the other
participants would call out whether you were hot
or cold? If you were hot then you were getting
closer and with cold you were searching further
away from what you wanted to find. This was
particularly great fun over Easter when looking
for the last chocolate bunnies.

Feedback is exactly the same. You get clues that
tell you whether you are hot or cold. These clues
may be presented by a person or by a thing. In
either case the feedback is giving you advice as
to whether you are hot or cold in your quest
towards your goal.

One of the worst ways to respond to feedback is
to cave in and quit. When you were a child, and
wanted that last chocolate Easter bunny, you
weren’t about to give in until that bunny was
found, preferably by yourself.

You didn’t give up because you really wanted
that chocolate. As we get older we become more
reluctant to listen to that hot and cold
feedback. We give up before you find that
chocolate treat. We quit when the search gets
too hard or we have far too many ‘cold’ calls.

Our perception of the feedback changed. When
we were kids the calls for hot and cold were
fun, part of a game. We didn’t mind if we got
a cold call. It was just information which we
used to try and steer ourselves closer to our
chocolate.

As we get older we think of these calls as
being criticism. When somebody tells us that
we are going in the wrong direction we imply
that they are telling us that we are bad,
incompetent, useless, stupid, or one of the
many other destroyers of self-confidence. We
take the feedback personally rather than
constructively.

Yet it is just information that we are
receiving. We are being told that we are
going the wrong way. We are not being told
that we are stupid. Yet if we take it as that,
we miss the opportunity to for course
correction. If we reject the information and
consider it as a negative attack all we
accomplish is further damage to our self worth.

Getting angry at the person giving the feedback
is also counterproductive. Stop taking feedback
personally and rather consider it to be
information designed to help you adjust your
path and find the right way forward.

What would help you reach your goal more
quickly? To get mad at the person who is trying
to teach you or to listen to him or her and try
to improve your game? One would think that this
is a no brainer of a question. Yet how often do
we get mad at people who give us feedback?

When receiving feedback, don’t take it personally;
take the feedback as information meant to help you
along your way. Also don’t get angry at the person
providing you with feedback. Rather take it under
consideration and be thankful for the directions
you are receiving.

How To Overcome The Rejection

Everyone faces opposition to their goals.
Whatever direction we are trying to take in our
life, there will be occasions where things just
do not go our way. One of these obstacles will
be rejection.

There are two ways to handling this in a
positive manner. The first one is to learn not
to take rejection personally. Don’t think of
them as weapons being used against you. There is
not a conspiracy by other people to make sure
that you don’t succeed.

On the contrary many people are eager to help us
get further in life. The fact that there are
individuals and organizations who don’t accept
your request has nothing to do with you personally.
It simply means that this particular request was
not right either for you or the other party involved.

It is important to understand this and to make it
a practice not to take rejection personally. When
somebody or some organization tells you that you or
your request is not suitable for their business,
team, or situation, don’t take it personally. It
really is not about you.

Everybody in this world is looking after themselves
more than they look after others. People work first
and foremost in their own best interests. If the
offering or talent you present does not fit into
their best interests you are not accepted. It is not
you; it is most likely a combination of timing and
circumstances.

The second skill you need to learn is to look forward.
If you have received a rejection from one source, ask
for feedback, review the possible reasons, and then
try somebody else or modify your request to overcome
the objections.

Don’t look backwards, continue to look forward. Just
because a particular person didn’t think your request
fit into their capability or needs, doesn’t mean that
there isn’t someone else out there who needs what you
have to offer.

J K Rowling, the extremely successful author of the
Harry Potter books, had many rejections before her first
book was accepted. If any book should have been snapped
up by publishers one would have thought Harry Potter
would have been it. But, there were at least 12 publishers
who didn’t see this gem when it was presented to them.

How do you know whether your gem will be spotted the first
time around, or even the twentieth time? You don’t know.
So don’t look backwards when someone says “no.” Look forward
and call out - next!

6 Ways to Ask for What You Want

It’s difficult for most of us to ask for help. We often fear that our request for help will be denied and we sometimes even expect that we will be rejected. To avoid the pain of this rejection we choose not to ask.

Here are five ways to make asking for help much easier. It will be worth your while to make a note of these tips when needing to ask for help. Being able to ask for help will make your life so much easier to navigate.

Tip 1. Ask as if you expect to receive help. A positive mindset will help you ask with greater confidence. You expect this help, you deserve to receive help and the person you are asking is happy to help. In fact they truly want to help you.

The difference between the two ways of asking is all in your expectation. Either you don’t expect to be helped or you do. The positive expectation will make your approach much friendlier; your mood will be lighter and you will cope with the whole process a lot better. Even if you get a no, you won’t take the rejection personally.

Tip 2. Assume you can. Don’t allow negativity into your mind. You will have a greater chance of finding a parking spot if you assume you will get one, than if you assume you won’t. Assume you will get a ticket to a show, a scholarship, a raise or the job. Assume the best for yourself and more often than not you will receive it.

Tip 3. Ask someone who can provide the help you need. Find out who is the right person by asking who can provide me with the answer, who is the person in charge, or who would you need to speak to in order to...? Researching who the right person or organization is will go a long way towards achieving success. Asking the right person will contribute hugely to your success.

Tip 4. Be clear and specific. When asking for help identify what you need help with. Be specific and be prepared to explain how the assistance will impact you

We tend to find it easy to ask for smaller things. If we need a baby sitter we know exactly what date and time you need a sitter for your children. It’s the bigger problems that we want find difficult to identify specifics. It is likely because we don’t feel comfortable admitting we need help.

Tip 5. Ask repeatedly. One of the most important principles of success is persistence. Don’t give up. Whenever you ask people to help you achieve our goal or solve your problem there will be some who say no. They might have other priorities, commitments and other reasons why they cannot help you. It’s not a reflection on you.

Get used to the idea that you will have some rejections along the way. Not everybody will be the right person to ask or will have the time to spend with you. If/when you are told no, follow up by asking for a referral to someone who can help.

Tip 6. Be sure to thank those you ask whether they agree to assist you or not. An attitude of gratitude will keep that door open for future requests.

La falsa moneda - Buika

I just really love the sound of this music...I think I could listen to it all day!

Let's Get Motivated

What's your motivation? What's keeps you going when you
sometimes do not feeling like continuing on? Do you have a
goal you want to accomplish? Are you trying to impress a loved
one? Are you motivated for health reasons? Well, whatever
your motivation is, let's get motivated and let stay motivated.

Motivated people get things done. Motivated people do not
procrastinate or hesitate when it comes time to do something.
Motivated people are successful people and successful people
are motivated people. You will never achieve success if you are
not motivated. A person's desire to be successful is their motivation.
Money could be your motivation, fame could be your motivation or
even wanting to help other people could be a motivation for you.
I believe that there is something that motivates everyone to do
something whether it is a negative or a positive motivator. Positive
motivation is what yields positive results and a positive lifestyle.

Self motivation is your ability to satisfy your desires or goals
without having to be influence by someone else. Self motivation
to me is the key to a healthy and successful life. Self motivation
puts you in control. You do not have to wait on someone to get
moving or get going. You encourage and motivate yourself. Self-
motivation along with self-esteem is what leads to self-improvement.
Self motivation helps you build your confidence in yourself. Self
motivated people are the leaders of the pack. Self motivated people
run and own the companies your work for and buy from. Self
motivated people do not make excuses they make the rules you
live by.

Now whether you need a little push to get going or not, that does not
matter. What matters is that you get moving and doing something
productive in life. Motivated people live longer, healthier and
successful lives than procrastinators and complainers. "So let's get
motivated and stop complaining!"
Kevin J Houston
“Motivating and Encouraging People For Life"
http://www.kevinjhouston.com
Blog: http://www.kevinjhouston.com/weblog

Check The Bottom Line

You’ve written down your goals, you’ve put
together an action plan, and now you are r
eady to go for it. Before you launch yourself
into prolonged activity it might be worth it
to work out what the bottom line will be when
you’ve achieved success.

Working out the bottom line means you work
out what the costs will be. The costs are
not necessarily only associated with
financial costs but may also be broader and
include relationship and personal costs,
time and resources costs.

Let’s have a look at the financial costs
first. If your goal is to get promoted and
move up the corporate ladder, or learn a
new skill you will want to go back to
school. You may determine that an MBA will
enhance your career prospects and assist
with your achieving your goal.

The financial costs involved in attaining
an MBA can be staggering. A good Business
School will cost you about $40,000 for
tuition. Over and above that you will need
books, and other supplies, as well as
several hours per day to work on the
program. Full time attendance will require
you to give up work; part time attendance
will extend the length of the program to
about 2 years.

Will you be able to put your other
commitments on the back burner for this
period of time? Will your family, friends,
and co-workers support your efforts? There
are many couples that get divorced when
one of the partners attempts such a
strenuous learning program. Will your
relationship survive?

Determining the true cost of your goal is
critically important. Discovering half way
through your plan that the end result is
going to cost more than you can pay in
money, emotion, time, or energy will mean
you will wasted an enormous amount of time
and effort on a goal that is beyond your
means.

I don’t write this to discourage you. Rather
I write this to help you map out your plan
in detail. Consider the implications of each
step of your goal and work to find ways to
accomplish them.

Tomorrow’s posting is about asking for help.
Until then, have a great day!

What Does It Take?

Hard Work and More Hard

In an interesting book by Malcolm Gladwell called Outliers, he makes the point over and over again that the people or groups of people who really make it put in at least 10,000 hours of work before they are remotely near becoming successful.

As an example Gladwell talks about the Beatles. The Beatles were a fairly mediocre band from Liverpool who played in quite small venues. They ended up going across to Hamburg to play there because they found more girls were interested in them and they could get drunk every night; important requirement for young men.

But what they had to do in Hamburg was play endless gigs. Hour after hour of performances later and they came back to the UK a much more polished band. Besides the practice they also had to cover other songs because their own repertoire was not extensive enough to fill the hours of time they had to play.

This meant their own music improved as they took on board some of the good music they were playing in their performances. Their own compositions were enriched by this experience as well as the standard of their musicianship. The many hours of practice and playing paid off once they came back to the UK.

It is often said by highly talented people that the only difference between talented people is that the successful ones work much harder. There are many people with similar talents but only very few manage to get ahead and make their mark.

This is equally true for musicians, artists, film makers, business people, explorers, sports people and any other field of specialization you can think of. It even applies to remote areas of interest such as tiddlywinks or spinning a top. The kid that is ahead of the pack and able to beat his opponent has practiced more.

This principle of putting in the practice is important to remember when somebody is trying to sell you a service or product that will save you all the practice time. View with suspicion. This applies to offers that promise you to be able to speak a new language in five weeks or make a ton of money in twenty four hours, or run a marathon with one month’s training.

None of these will work. But what attracts people to these false promises is the belief that all things come easily. People do believe that achievements can be overnight. Weight loss is just around the corner just drink berry juice. Or you can play the piano straight away by just following the notes being played by your electric keyboard.

How do you approach your goals? Do you believe that they will just come along without any hard work or have you looked at them realistically and realized that the only way you will reach them is through hard work and perseverance?

Is this the reason why there are so few highly successful people and so many people who are prepared to live an ok kind of life? It all boils down to putting in the effort, working hard at it and doing this as long as it takes to achieve your goal.

Nothing Beats Practice

All things being equal whether talent, intelligence, creativity, ability or inclination the one thing that distinguishes people is the amount of practicing they do. A football player will have similar talent to other players. What gets him to play for the big clubs and his national side is his dedication to practice.

The same applies to all aspects of your life. What will distinguish you from others in your field will be the amount of dedication you have towards making yourself expert in that area by practicing at it.

Think of an area in your life where you typically shine; a discipline in which you are excellent. How did you get there? Did you work hard at it and add practice to improve on your talents?

The same applies to the leaders in their field. They have taken their talents and have added enormous amounts of work and practice to them in order to be the leaders. The pianist who makes it as a concert performer will have practiced harder than one who never quite makes the cut and ends up teaching piano and performing in the church hall.

The great breakthroughs in scientific discoveries have been by people who have worked long hours and with immense dedication. The golfing legend Gary Player used to say that the harder he worked the luckier he got on the golf course.

Focus your attention on what you wish to achieve. This may be in any area of your life whether it involves being a good parent, a contributing member of the community or a coach of your local kid’s baseball team.
Spend time learning and acquiring knowledge, working as a volunteer, spending extra hours with each child and monitoring progress. In each instance spend time on practicing the skills required for the task.

You are able to learn and practice in every area of your life. If you want to be a better parent, then read parenting books, join a support group or have sessions with a family counselor. Work with your children and communicate to see where your relationship may be improved. Put effort into the task.

The same applies to being a member of your community. Put in additional work to learn how to be a valuable member. Volunteer, learn new skills that you can contribute with, offer to run a class at the local centre, take part in fundraising efforts or attend a youth leadership course so that you can become a meaningful team member.

Every part of your life will be enhanced if you spend time learning and practicing the skills required. The same applies to every goal you set yourself. If you want to be at the top, the most successful in whatever you aspire to then you have to practice harder than anybody else.

What makes a tennis player win a tournament is certainly talent and ability. But what makes that player beat other competitors is more practice than anybody else. They have put more effort into their work whether that is training on court, eating the right food, gym training or motivational training.

 The winners spend more time at practice. Ensure you have practice time built into your plan for your success and you will achieve what you have set out to do no matter what the goal.

Be willing to do what it takes

You’ve set your goals, made your plans and are now ready 

to roll towards your dream. Are you really willing to do 

what it takes? Will you put everything on the line to 

achieve your dream or will you give up because in the end 

the sacrifice was too much?

This does not mean “anything” in the sense of unethical, 

illegal, or immoral action. It does, however, mean 

personal sacrifice. There are many examples of this 

principle to choose from. The winners are the ones who 

have sacrificed everything. 

When we see a "winner" we are looking at the culmination 

of years of sacrifice and effort. Lance Armstrong makes it

look easy to ride a bicycle up a mountain. Tiger Woods 

makes it look easy to shoot 9 under par. The Williams 

sisters make tennis look as simple as a game of pong.

The reality is that the Tiger Woods of this world gave up 

their youth to spend on the golf course. The Williams 

sisters gave up their childhood to play tennis. Tom Daley, 

the youngest competitor for Great Britain in the Beijing 

Olympics, spends all his free time working on his diving. 

He is giving up most of what the normal teenager 

entertains himself with. He is doing what it takes to 

become a world championship winning diver.

It’s easy to see this dedication in sports people. We see 

the results of their sacrifice. But there are many people 

who are as willing to do what it takes without having the 

fame and fortune that the sports world gives to its heroes. 

These are the successful people in all walks of life.

You might want to become a doctor. That means you will 

have to study very hard at school to ensure you gain the 

knowledge expected dispensed by the medical school. Once 

you finish medical school you can expect to work long 

hours during an internship, as you prove that you learned 

and have the myriad skills required to be a good doctor. 

What are you willing to sacrifice to attain this goal?

Your goal might be to become a manager in your company. 

This might involve studying in the evenings and working 

week-ends. Or you might want to get an MBA because you 

hope this will get you the promotion you are striving for. 

There will be times on your journey when you feel that 

your goal is not worth the sacrifices you making. What 

will stop you? What other commitments, distractions, and 

hurdles will you allow to get the better of you?

One reason people fail to achieve their goal, one thing 

they do not anticipate accurately is how effort and time 

it will take to make it happen. If you do not anticipate 

what you will have to give up to make it a reality, the 

sacrifices will be even more difficult to make.

If you want to achieve your goal then be prepared to do 

what it takes.

Creating a Leverage

What does "Creating Leverage" mean and how does that help you get what you want? Many people find that they can leverage a goal by promising themselves a reward for achieving small steps along the way, or even a major reward for accomplishing the goal. Positive leverages work well for goals that involve sacrifice along the way. Goals such as a weight loss, or saving money. Small rewards along the way provide additional encouragement that may not be forthcoming from your support group.

The problem that I have found with positive rewards, however, is that they often just do not carry enough power to get you through the tough times. During the really strong moments of temptation to slip back and ignore the goal a positive reward is easily blown off. “I don’t really want to…anyway,” is a common mind game played with a positive reward. For this reason I recommend that you incorporate negative leverages for the first few times.

How does that work? If you associate enough pain to something (think negatively about it with feeling), you will easily over come the temptation to skip a work out, eat an extra slice of pizza, or cut class. In order for this to work you must be brutally honest with yourself and you will need an accountability partner.

Step one is to identify the major goal and the milestone associated with achieving that goal. Write these down on a calendar with hard dates (deadlines) for achieving each step.

Step two is to identify the leverage. This part requires honesty on your part. The more honest you are the more powerful the leverage will be. Write down three core values that you feel very strongly about. This can be a very simple step – for example are you a liberal, a conservative, a libertarian? Are you very religious, an atheist, an environmentalist? Do you feel strongly about animal rights? You get the idea.

Step three is the fun part. Next to each of these three values write the antithesis value. Conservative – Liberal. Animal rights – animal testing. Environmentalist – Slash and burn etc. Now identify a group or cause the represents the antithesis of for example if you are a liberal you could write the Republican National Committee or Rush Limbaugh. If you are conservative you can write Nancy Pelosi, the DNC, or maybe the ACLU.

Step four involves your accountability partner. This cannot be a spouse, or girlfriend/boyfriend. I use PayPal for this part because it is the easiest way that I know how to do it. Basically your partner will invoice you a repeating payment to charge your card on each of the dates set up in step one. The amount of the charges should total an amount that will cause you pain to loose., but not enough to make you lose your house, apartment etc. It should, however, be enough that will not be able to take that family vacation. Does this give you leverage to get what you want? You bet it does! :)

If you achieve your milestone your accountability partner will refund the charge to your card. If you don’t make the milestone the charge will stick and your accountability partner will donate it, in your name, to the organization that most represents the antithesis of your core values.

Do not under estimate the power of this leverage. It is no longer a small reward for achieving the goal, nor is it simply a bit of money. Rather it is a significant amount of money and it is going to support something that you strongly oppose. Once you show your brain enough *pain*, you will have created leverage that will empower you to overcome any temptation or obstacle which has stood in the way of achieving what you want.

Think of the thing you want, but you are not getting. One of the reasons you might not be getting it is because you don't really think you can. That thought pattern is stopping you from getting it, and that's what you want to work on. If you are unwilling to accept this challenge you are admitting before you start that you have no intention of achieving this goal.

You need a leverage to help you get through the tough times, the tempting times, the moments when you are weak or think you want to give up. This leverage is the powerful tool I know of to help you achieve goals, over come obstacles, and maybe even leap tall buildings with a single bound.

If you are interested in creating a leverage and want an accountability coach, contact me and I’ll be glad to help you. I do charge a very small fee for this to cover the PayPal charges and my times spent in setting it up, but I can tell you that almost everyone who accepts this leverage achieves their goal on time.

Have a great Labor Day Weekend!

Thanks for reading.

6 Tips to Push Your Achievements into Overdrive

Here are six special ways to give your goals some much needed impetus. Use these tips to energize your campaign, to achieve your goals and to keep them top of mind at all times.

1) Identify your main goal. Whatever your main goal is, the one that you absolutely want to achieve, should be your main focus.

2)Make sure your goal stretches you. Ensure that this goal will push you further than you might think you are capable of going. Pick one that you really want to achieve where there is already some burning desire and amplify it, make it further than you imagined at the beginning. Make sure that achieving this goal will truly make you stretch yourself.

3)Once you have identified this goal record it in great detail. Of course, you can use whatever means work the best for you. Some people are best at working with words, most people however will prefer the visual aspect, but combining visual, auditory, and written word will create the most value.

4)From your newly created details, pull out the most important statement and write this one on a piece of paper that you are able to carry with you at all times and post it where you will see it through out the day.
Now that you have your main goal written down in short hand, don’t neglect it. Take out that piece of paper at least three times a day and study the words. Read them with concentration and make a positive statement involving the completion of your goal.

5) To give your goals a turbo boost of energy use a symbolic gesture to confirm that you have achieved this. If your goal is to earn a large amount of money, write a check or create a bank statement that shows that large sum of money in the bank. Put this somewhere where you can see it. Find something that represents your goal at the moment of achievement. Make it physical and touchable.

6)Finally create a leverage for achieving your goal. Tomorrow's post will be about how to create an effective leverage. Don't underestimate the power of this tool!

Great Strategy for Adults and Kids

Patti Handy is a Cash Coach for Teens, however her advice is sound for all age groups. Take a minute to watch this short video Patti produced:



She has a weekly posting similar to this so be sure to check out her latest. If you have children and want to teach them money management skills, I do recommend Patti's book "How to Ditch Your Allowance and be Richer than Your Parents"

The Secret to Success

Hey Reader,

Lean in close, I need to tell you
something, in confidence.

Just a little closer... "Ready?"

"See, I know the secret. The secret
to you becoming a raving success.
The secret to you having everything
you've ever wanted in life."

"Would you like to know what the secret
is?"

Here it is...

"Do something, do anything, just do it."

Most people shuffle through life too
afraid of the possibility of failure
to ever even try to succeed.

But, you're not like most people are you?

You're strong, brave and not afraid to
take a little tiny risk. A little tiny
risk that could unlock all the success
you deserve.

Take the risk, it's going to take you off
the path of mediocrity and send you flying
down the road of success.

I promise...

Do something, do anything, right now!

Learn to Fail with Purpose

No learning experience is quite as powerful as learning from your mistakes.

Whatever happened to that famous saying, "if at first you don’t succeed try and try again"? Yet how afraid are we of failing? Sometimes we do not even start on a new adventure because we area afraid of failing.

Try for a different job? Oh no, can’t do that. Take a different route, cook a new meal, experiment with new seeds, learn to ride a motorcycle, ski dive, exercise...

If we do not have the courage to try out small things such as trying a new food, how can we ever find the courage it takes to leave one career and start something totally different? Or to learn Mandarin and work in China, or to volunteer to work in Rwanda.

What about the courage to start running for a marathon. Or add swimming and cycling to your running to try your hand at a triathlon. What about finding a new hobby like paragliding, or wind surfing, or learn a new game?

For each one of these activities and challenges there are many small steps of trial and error that will get you there. You don’t need to immediately enter a marathon. You can run a few 5km races first. In fact you don’t even need to run, you can take part in walks. Try out little events and build up to the full one.

All it takes is for you to have the courage to fail once in a while. Take some time to learn to pronounce that Mandarin word, or learn to write a character. You will get it wrong many times because it is so different from our western language and alphabet. But what a wonderful feeling when you get it right because you know you have achieved something big.

Didn’t quite finish that first marathon? You will have learned from the experience. You will have learned that you didn’t drink enough, shouldn’t have run in new shoes, needed something to stop the chafing, a hat to keep cool, more training or better nutrition. There will be many new lessons. And some of those lessons will extend further than your running. They will be life lessons that will help you in other areas.

Regrettably we start off our educational experience learning that failure is bad for us. When we fail at school we are punished. We might be moved to another class, or even have to repeat the year. We certainly will not get the certificate that the valedictorian received.

If we fail at school we will not be asked to make the final speech. We will not have our name on a plaque in the entrance. We will not play in the first team and we have no chance of attending a good University. Failing in school is not good for you.

The work environment is seldom any different. You don’t get promotion if you lose a big sale or a big customer. You are not encouraged to fail at anything. And the people who get promoted are usually the ones who have less failures.

With this kind of learning, it’s hardly surprising that we don’t try out new things or challenge ourselves to reach loftier goals. Failure is bad. Can’t do failure. So we don’t even try. However, holding ourselves back because of fear of failure is the ultimate failure.

What we must remember is that success follows failure. If we learn from our mistakes and always strive to do better we can master even most challenging tasks. The mastery of any skills is the culmination of many failures and successes.

Practice more action and less planning

Many people never get past paper planning of what they want to achieve in life. Their successes stay firmly rooted on paper and never see the light of day. If this has happened to you, be aware that you are not alone.

So why did you never reach your goals? Why didn't you have the energy to move past the planning stage? Successful people do more and plan less. They do not wait for the right moment to get going. We had a saying in the Army that was something like this"an 80% solution on time is better than a 100% solution too late."

Successful people don’t wait until the end of a recession to start their dream business. They don’t wait until the summer to start their swimming program. They don’t wait until they have a flawless resume before they start applying for jobs. They just do it.

So what are you waiting for? Are you waiting for the perfect moment, or the right amount of inspiration. Do you need permission from someone else to become successful or are you waiting for your partners or family to reassure you?

Do you think a successful partnership will happen if somebody else changes, or do you wait for the right person to come along. Have you sat at home not wanting to start that small business because you were waiting for your kids to grow up?

Or maybe you are hoping the laws will change, or that somebody will spot your talent, head hunt you or notice your exceptional skills.

Maybe you are even waiting for somebody to pass on clear instructions or you are hoping as you get older that you will develop more self-confidence. And most probably you are waiting until everybody thinks you are great and nobody will laugh at your attempts at achieving your goals.

All of these points indicate fear of failure. Fear to take this new step. If you are frightened that you will not achieve your goal. You worry that people will criticize you. You carry around with you a number of limiting beliefs that prevent you from taking any action whatsoever.

No action means you will get nowhere and definitely will not reach your goal. Yet taking some form of action, even if a very tiny step could lead you to having the courage to take the next one.

You could find that the first step is a tiny success story on its own. Not only will this first step bring you some action with results even if small, it could mean that the momentum has started and the environment starts to support your efforts. It could also mean that you take courage and find it easier to take the next step. Take that first step. Make the first move.

Go Out and Hustle

There are many people who have wondered why the Law of Attraction isn’t working for them. Here they are with their goals all nicely worked out, their vision board beautifully made up with amazing pictures, poetry, even some multimedia bits. Yet nothing has come about.

One can plan, one can write strategies, and one can draw the best charts that anybody has ever seen. But if you do not take any action towards your goals you will never reach them.

Affirmations open your mind to what can be done. Visualization lets you work out how your holidays will look and how you will feel while in that picture. But without action to move you towards your dreams you will go nowhere.

When you take action, things start to happen. Attending a course you need to progress your career will likely result in new acquaintances who may help you further.

Take action to go on that dream vacation. Start saving money, or studying the language and culture of the people where you want to go. Find people who have been there and get advice on how to travel for less money.

You want that special car? Take action towards getting it. That might mean finding an additional of income. You want to graduate with honors, start teaching other students. Nothing is quite as good for revision than having to know enough to teach somebody else.

You want to take part in a marathon and get in better shape? Find a running club and join this week. It doesn’t matter if you can’t afford those expensive running shoes just yet. Go and run in your old sneakers.

Start towards your goal by actually taking the first steps and doing something. Get the journey started. To get the success you hope for yourself, take the same action other successful people have taken.

Follow the path that successful people have taken and make it your own. Create your own plan and take action. That is take physical action, don’t just imagine the action. Write an e-mail, introduce yourself to an important person in your field, sign up to a course, write your first article for your new blog.

Whatever it is, do it. Regrettably in life, nothing will happen if you don’t take action. No amount of recorded motivational speaking will get you to your goal. No hours of visualization will get you your new car. No hours of reading other people’s success stories will make you successful.

Take action. Make that first move. Do the very first thing that you have noted in your action plan. And then take the next step and the next. Eventually moving along will have it’s own dynamics and you will find yourself moving along steadily and surely towards your goal.

Just do it!

Don’t create success and lie in it set another goal

The #1 Reason Why Most Goals Never Manifest

I am sure you understand the idea of setting goals in life to empower yourself. Perhaps what you don't know is that goals require a constant stream of force behind them to keep them alive. In other words, you need to push them all the time to make them come true.

Constantly pushing of your goals, while necessary, is also detrimental to the effective manifestation of the goals themselves. Goals are artificially created by the mind and backed up by the concepts and beliefs that allow them to work.

Take away the concepts and beliefs that give them the foundation to live and your goals will evaporate in no time at all.


How Does This Look in Practice?

Let’s assume you've set a goal to lose weight. As you may already know, it is important to set each goal precisely. So losing weight, like any goal, should include exact particulars of what you want to accomplish. Let’s say you want to lose 25 pounds over the next three months, starting today. This goal needs a foundation to work. You need to have some sort of motivation that encourages you to accomplish this goal.

Perhaps one or more of the following acts as your motivation to lose the weight:

• You want to look attractive to others
• You want to look attractive to your partner
• You believe that you are overweight
• You want to fit into your favorite dress or pants again

You need a reason to lose the weight, something that can motivate you to achieve your goal. Whatever the reason behind the goal, you absolutely need to have one, otherwise you won’t have the motivation to even start.

Think of the reason as the decision to change something in your life and the motivation as the energy that affects that change.

The mere act of starting on any goal can be incredibly challenging as it involves being willing to change some of your usual behaviors and concepts in life. We all know what a challenge changing your behavior and concepts can be!

Behavior is changed in the physical domain while concepts are changed in the mental domain. This double whammy of both the physical and the mental is what makes a simple life change like weight loss such a challenge to bring off successfully.

Successful goals always come from a corresponding change in the mental domain.

Why is This?

Simply put, it is because your mind and your thoughts are what create your reality. If you change only your behavior, you will have only short-term success. In time, you will fall back into your old patterns of behavior – the very thing you tried to change in the first place!

So let's assume you are in the second month of your weight loss goal and your partner leaves you. What happens to your goal about losing weight? It doesn’t matter anymore, it diminishes and evaporates into thin air. You just took away both the foundation and the energy for accomplishing your goal. You no longer have a reason and you've lost your motivation.

The problem with goals is that they depend on life circumstances – and they are always forced by mental concepts.


How About Dreams?

Your dreams are powered by Source, by the ultimate power of consciousness. Your dreams are the recognition of what you can do with the unique gifts and talents you have brought into this life. Every person exists with a unique set of talents. These talents lead to a unique way of expressing themselves through various forms of creativity. Universal creativity is really what powers everything behind all manifestation.

With this creativity you are able to serve other people, and in return, you get rewarded with a form of energy. In Western civilization, the most common reward is often money, but creative rewards often come in many other energetic forms like status and recognition, authority, greater outreach to others and more.

In Summary:
You discover your strengths, gifts and talents. You find ways to use them that enrich and support society in practical ways. You are in service to others for serving others in this way is truly life’s ultimate purpose.

Your dreams are powered by your unique creative abilities. These abilities are like a never-ending fountain, the wellspring of your life. They will always be with you, in good times and bad. They are completely apart from and independent of mental concepts. They are powered by your true nature. You can deny them, but you can’t get rid of them.

Even on the worst day of your life, your dreams still exist. If you don’t live your dreams, you must constantly suppress them by engaging in mental concepts like:

• I am too old to start
• I don’t know how to do it
• Nobody will be interested in it
• My friends will hate me when I do it
• You name it!

I have used the words force and power in association with goals and dreams. To understand the concepts behind these words, I highly recommend David Hawkins' book Power Versus Force. Here are a few definitions from the book that help explain the idea of power versus force:

• Force is associated with the partial, power with the whole
• Force must always be justified, power requires no justification
• Force always creates counter-force and its effect is limited by definition
• Force is a movement, power is a skill
• Force always moves against something, power doesn’t move against anything at all
• Force is incomplete and therefore has to be fed energy constantly
• Power is total and complete in itself and requires nothing from outside
• Force constantly consumes while power energizes, supplies and supports
• Pow er gives life and energy, force takes these away
• Power is associated with compassion, force is associated with judgment
• Force requires proof and support, power is inarguable and not subject to proof

People who fulfill their dreams are the happiest people on earth.

They do what’s in their nature. In the end, it is completely irrelevant to them what kind of dreams they have. Dreams don’t need to fit into anything. They don’t need any approval. They don’t need any money to start.

Goals are temporary fixes of your mental desires that do not provide you with lasting happiness. The new car will get old and rusty, the new house will lose its charm over time, and if your goal is to create the perfect partner, you will begin to see your partner’s imperfections over time as well.

Your dreams are a recognition of what you truly are and how you can contribute to this world. You will never do anything else in life more important than this. In fact, in a very real sense there is nothing else in life but this. There is no true retirement from the contributions you can make in this life. You literally live the dream that is your life to your very last breath.

Why not start today to live your dreams in earnest? Check out the Dream Manifestation Kit. It is the perfect tool to help you manifest all your goals, desires and life dreams.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help

Your lack of know-how and limited funds will
never slow you down again!

“I would love to find success in the world”. “I would
love that but I have No mentor, No online talent and No
money to do it”

How many times have thoughts like this kept you from
pursuing your dreams?

Ray Kroc was a 52 year old salesman of milkshake machines.
He knew nothing about running A restaurant, starting a franchise,
or running a major business. He did not have the talent or money
needed to start a franchise and yet he created the most successful
restaurant franchise system in history- McDonalds.

How can this be?

How can obstacles that stop most dead in their tracks be a
launching pad for the successful ones?

Well, when successful people, whether their successful at
the time or not, are confronted with an insurmountable
roadblock they simply see it as a signal.

It’s a green light signal that the situation their in
requires outside help.

So what should you do?

You want to invest in a mentor who will show you the skills
to use and provide some external accountability. All you need
is a great mentor, who is going to show you the best strategies
to reach your dreams in record time.

Achieving Goals Requires Real Action

Set your goals and create an action plan. Decide what you are
going to achieve in how much time. In broad strokes develop a
diagram that shows what needs to be done and be as thorough
as possible while developing this.

That’s all very well. What’s next? Elaborate
diagrams are not going to get you closer to your goals. This
is the next step then. You need to create a to-do list. From
your diagram you will be able to work out what needs to be
done and in what sequence.


Many people get stuck at this point. Planning is always easier
than execution. Once you start doing things you inevitably
start facing challenges, obstacles, and of course the people
who sabotage your efforts.

Nothing is more difficult to overcome than sabotage by "friends"
and family. Often times the sabotage is not done intentionally,
at least not at a conscious level. However, your decision to
change can be frightening to others.

You have been considering change for a long time. You've mulled
it over, weighed the pros and cons, and finally decided to take
action. Your friends and family have most likely not been in on
your internal debates so your plan hits them out of the blue
and disrupts the comfort zone they have with you.

This little problem along with obstacles you've planned for will
make it very difficult to start the actual activities necessary
to achieve your goal. Even just making the first step becomes a
hurdle when one starts to think through the perceived
consequences.

These are all real obstacles and you will need to overcome them.
You will need support to achieve your goals and bringing those
closest to you into the planning will help co-opt them to help
you succeed.

Take that first step and you will be amazed how many people are
actually applauding.

To overcome the many obstacles you will face it is a good idea
to create a real action plan. By planning real-time actions you
are placing the focus on doing rather than thinking. Moving on
your goals is far more useful than sitting around thinking
negative thoughts.

Schedule at least five actions you want to take and schedule
the completion of the most important one as the very first task
to complete. If you complete your toughest job first all others
will feel like a stroll in the park.

As an example if you need to cold call a company for a
sponsorship or endorsement deal and you have never them before
you will want to complete this task first of all otherwise it
will hang over you.

Another great way to accomplish your tasks is to prepare your
list and plan the night before. This way you are ready to roll
first thing in the morning. Eliminate any excuses and get
started on your list.

Many people will waste an entire day trying to decide what they
want to do that day. And the next day the same process stops
them from achieving anything again. It can be an endless cycle
of non-action.

Prepare your action plan with your key tasks the evening before
and you will have no excuse not to go for it. Once you have
achieved a momentum you will find it easier to work every day
on reaching your goals.

Information For healthy living

The Value of a Mastermind

Consider the wealth of knowledge contained in a room of experts with different backgrounds, talents, and in different fields: - the areas where you lack expertise. Now imagine that group of experts is collaborating so that you can achieve your goals and dreams.

I’ve been in mastermind groups for just over 2 years. My first mastermind experience was with a group I paid to be a member of. This was a diverse group business men and women focused on improving our current ventures or starting a new business. A few of us broke out of that group and started our own, smaller, more focused mastermind. The diversity of our backgrounds and experience is our strength. This group continues to be an incredible resource for me. There is a special kind of bond that happens when you regularly connect people who are pursuing similar goals and life ambitions. In fact we just met in Dallas for our quarterly meeting.

Mastermind groups are a great way to move forward, whether you are an entrepreneur or an employee. I began this new mastermind group to help me focus on the challenges that all small business owners face: thinking bigger, discovering what works (and what doesn’t) from your peers, leveraging each other’s skills and education, sharing proven resources, etc. This kind of connection time is a powerful way to leap forward in your thinking and results.

Here are five insights of why a Mastermind helps you thrive:

1. Brainstorming is more powerful where two or more minds are gathered. When you tap into the power of a mastermind, opportunities are unlimited. Napoleon Hill in Think and Grow Rich talked about the power of the third mind. This is a type of synergistic potentiality that can only happen when multiple people build on each other’s ideas. Often our thoughts are limited to our current and past experiences, so the more diverse the group, the more powerful the breakthroughs can be.

2. Personal accountability. It is easy to slip into the habits that have kept us in our current challenges when we follow the same old routines. We can be our own worst enemies when it comes to accountability and staying on track. For many of us there is no boss, just goals. We will let ourselves off the hook when necessary or slide into playing small again. When you have a mastermind call or live retreat to prepare for and you know that people are going to be listening to your updates, it’s like a kick in the pants to remember to stay on track. In our group we follow a simple agenda:

· What did you accomplish since our last meeting?

· What are your challenges obstacles?

· What will you accomplish before our next meeting?

· What is the leverage? (more about this later)

3. Other people’s ideas can stimulate a healthy challenge. It only takes one new idea to put you on track for incredible results. There is a difference between playing it safe and stepping into our bigger game. Left to our own devices…most of us unconsciously play small. When you listen to how others think and strategize, it can help you grow and expand your “box” as well as challenge you to play a bigger game.

4. The realization that your obstacles are shared by many. It can be comforting to know you aren’t the only one who has struggles and challenges. Transformation starts the minute you become aware of the problem. But if we aren’t aware that something is a problem, then it’s impossible to fix it. Many times a fellow group member’s breakthrough can be exactly what you needed to hear to help you realize where you’ve been getting in your own way.

5. Overcome isolation to thrive with connection. Dan Kennedy says, “Being an entrepreneur is the loneliest job on the planet.” Most of us work alone from home, surrounded by people who need something from us or just don’t understand our passion for our work. A mastermind can be a powerful way to stay connected to people who get us, overcome the feeling of isolation and be a springboard for taking your business into new dimensions of success.

If you are interested in starting or joining a mastermind group shoot me an email and I’ll help you get started.

Expect Success

That’s right! Don’t sit back and hope that clients will come your way and that this business might work for you. Expect it! Go in with a winning attitude. An attitude that no matter what obstacles come your way, no matter what challenges arise, you will meet them. Not only will you meet them, you will face them and grow in strength by overcoming, and rising above them. Expect Success!

Let's look at where you are in your business. Some of you are seasoned work-at-home moms with thriving practices, while others have just entered into the arena. You want what those pros have. Well -- don't just want it—expect it. Make this your motto. Start each new project, or each new marketing venture, with this new attitude, and with this new motto—Expect Success. Before long, it becomes second nature to you. You start automatically assuming the outcome will be successful.

Now, in starting a business there are some steps you have to take. You'll find the first one is the big one. It's the Attitude Step. You need to make the transformation from "employee" or "stay-at-home mom” to successful entrepreneur. The mind-set changes right from there. Expect Success!

Next we're on to some of the business basics. A successful entrepreneur professionally chooses the name that best suits their business. To do this, they visualize that name on their business cards, on their signature line, on the bottom of the letter, with the name President directly right above it. Expect Success! Now, more motivated than ever, our successful entrepreneur needs to choose that all important domain name and get ideas for a website. They research the net for days, weeks, writing down all the fine qualities they see in other web sites. Never copying! Merely researching, constantly thinking of ways to be different and unique makes it work. How they can combine their own strengths and skills to fit into their business, which will then be listed on THEIR WEB SITE. They read. They write. They Dream!

At this point they start seeing that "Yes, it will happen." In their research they have found the organizations, associations and list-serves that the other entrepreneurs in their field are active on. They have seen the common denominators of those that are successful. They too get involved. They look for additional training courses, if needed, and sign up for the ones they know will help them meet their goals. They develop their marketing plan and design their promotional materials. They read everything they can on starting a business. They have a plan and they EXPECT SUCCESS!! They now see that the future of their business is just within their reach. They share with others their excitement, and then they wait for the time they can finally say, “I'm ready!” EXPECT SUCCESS, and it can be yours.

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Diana Ennen, Author; Virtual Assistant the Series, Become a Highly Successful, Sought After VA with co-author, Kelly Poelker. She’s the president of Virtual Word Publishing, www.virtualwordpublishing.com, offering publicity and book marketing. Article is free to be reprinted as long as author’s bio remains intact.

SMART Goals

“Set your goals high and don't stop until you get there.”
- Bo Jackson

Creating S.M.A.R.T. Goals

Specific
Measurable
Attainable
Realistic
Timely

Specific – The more specific you can make your goal the more likely you are to achieve it. Being specific is not about being inflexible, rather it is about thinking in detail about what it is you will accomplish. To set a specific goal you must answer the six "W" questions:

*Who: Who is involved?
*What: What do I want to accomplish?
*Where: Identify a location.
*When: Establish a time frame.
*Which: Identify requirements and constraints.
*Why: Specific reasons, purpose or benefits of accomplishing the goal.

EXAMPLE: A general goal would be, "Get in shape." But a specific goal would say, "I will shed 15 pounds of unsightly fat, reducing my body fat percentage to 11 in 60 days. To accomplish this I will join xyz health club and do 3 resistance and 3 cardio workouts a week. I'll also adjust my eating habits to conform with a 40/30/30 ratio of carbs/protiens/fats to speed my metabolism and help my body recover from the workouts. Achieving this goal will help me increase my self confidence and help me be a better player on the rugby team."

Measurable - Establish concrete criteria for measuring progress toward the attainment of each goal you set. When you measure your progress, you stay on track, reach your target dates, and experience the exhilaration of achievement that spurs you on to continued effort required to reach your goal.

To determine if your goal is measurable, ask questions such as......How much? How many? How will I know when it is accomplished?

Attainable - When you identify goals that are most important to you, you begin to figure out ways you can make them come true. You develop the attitudes, abilities, skills, and financial capacity to reach them. You begin seeing previously overlooked opportunities to bring yourself closer to the achievement of your goals.

You can attain most any goal you set when you plan your steps wisely and establish a time frame that allows you to carry out those steps. Goals that may have seemed far away and out of reach eventually move closer and become attainable, not because your goals shrink, but because you grow and expand to match them. When you list your goals you build your self-image. You see yourself as worthy of these goals, and develop the traits and personality that allow you to possess them.

Realistic - To be realistic, a goal must represent an objective toward which you are both willing and able to work. A goal can be both high and realistic; you are the only one who can decide just how high your goal should be. But be sure that every goal represents substantial progress. A high goal is frequently easier to reach than a low one because a low goal exerts low motivational force. Some of the hardest jobs you ever accomplished actually seem easy simply because they were a labor of love.

Your goal is probably realistic if you truly believe that it can be accomplished. Additional ways to know if your goal is realistic is to determine if you have accomplished anything similar in the past or ask yourself what conditions would have to exist to accomplish this goal.

Timely - A goal should be grounded within a time frame. With no time frame tied to it there's no sense of urgency. If you want to lose 15 lbs, when do you want to lose it by? "Someday" won't work. But if you anchor it within a time-frame, "by May 1st", then you've set your unconscious mind into motion to begin working on the goal.

T can also stand for Tangible - A goal is tangible when you can experience it with one of the senses, that is, taste, touch, smell, sight or hearing. When your goal is tangible you have a better chance of making it specific and measurable and thus attainable.

This article was adopted from a similar article posted at topendsports.com to see the original article click here.